What a lucky girl I am

Today was the ending of a very emotional time in my life.  Today we buried my dear Uncle Herman.  

I have several uncles but my uncle Herman was so much more than just an uncle to me.  I think of him as my 2nd father.  I think that is why for some it has been hard for them to understand how deep my grief has been.  As many people know I lost my mother 18 years ago to a sudden illness and honestly I was so scared because I had a 2 1/2 year old daughter plus my 10 week old daughter.  I had no idea how I was going to manage bringing up my girls without the help of my mother.  But my Nana Pat and Uncle Herman stepped right up without missing a beat to serve as surrogate grandparents for my girls along with surrogate parents to me.  
I was adopted in November 1966 and was the first grandchild on my mother's side of the family.  The Lord blessed my poor mother by letting my Nana Pat live directly across the street so when I was up crying night after night, Nana Pat was there to help my mother.  My Uncle Herman was off in Vietnam fighting the war so Nana had time to spend with me.  

  I have to admit it probably took 2 sets of parents to raise me.  I think I was quiet a handful.  But as the years went on even when they had their own child, my cousin Krisie, (who is just like a sister to me) I always knew I could depend on Nana and Herman.  My Nana was known around town as the Girl Scout Lady but rest assured Herman was the Girl Scout Man.  
He always backed Pat up on what ever she was under taking - if it was baking 25 coconut cakes to give out at Christmas or feed the entire family every Sunday what seemed like a Thanksgiving meal, he was right there helping out. But he was never a proud or boastful man, never one to want to receive any credit for anything he did.  He did the things he did because he wanted to and certainly not for any recognition. 
He had a job that required him to travel often but he always made sure he talked to my Nana at least twice a day.  When I think of an example of a loving and faithful husband I always think of Uncle Herman.  I hope that one day my children and others will think that way of my marriage although we are somewhat more vocal in our disagreements than either of them were.  
My uncle was the rock or maybe the corner stone of our family.  If I ever needed advice or an opinion on something we should do I always knew I could go to him.  He just played such an important part in my life.  And in so many others.  
Herman was a very educated man but never did he make anyone that was not as educated feel like less of a person.  He was a faithful member of his church and played so many roles in keeping the church going and on track.  He never tried to push his way on others because "it was his way" but rather he was always open to discussion to see if perhaps there were other ways or changes that needed to be made to his suggestions that would make it better.  
He served his country in Vietnam and received the purple heart.  He was faithful and loyal to his country. 

 He was faithful and loyal to his wife.  He was faithful and loyal to his daughter Krisie, granddaughter Lindsay and grandson Brandon.   He was also faithful and loyal to my sister and me.  We were merely his wife's sister's adopted children but at no time  did he ever make us feel any less a part of the family.  When my precious sister Susan fought her courageous battle with breast cancer I do not know what we would have done without my aunt and uncle.  They helped us in far too many ways for me to ever thank them for.  They were preparing for her to come live her last days in their home.  Although it never came to that,  my nana was right their in Houston holding her hand when she went to her heavenly home.  
I have never once doubted that if I ever needed a place to live or anything else I could ask either of them and it would have been offered to me with no strings attached.  

As I sat in the service today celebrating this remarkable man's life so many different things ran through my head.  He was such a remarkable man who could be serious one minute and then making us laugh so hard the next.  He was someone I could depend on and someone I held in very high respect.   I respected his love for his God that I do not think anyone ever questioned, his love for his family, his commitment to his job and to his church.  
I just could not seem to keep my emotions in check today.  I had witnessed this strong man have to fight a battle with cancer and all of the horrible ways it took a toll on his body. All I could think of was why?  This was so unfair for this wonderful, loving man to have to suffer the way he did.  But my Uncle Herman left this world with all the dignity he had earned.  I never once heard him ask God "Why me?", although I have ask that question and I still am asking that question but rather he wanted to continue with experimental treatment as long as he could on the off chance that something could be learned that would help other people.  
I do rejoice in the fact that when he left this earth for the Heavenly Home our God has waiting for us that he was greeted by all of our loved ones that have gone before us.   And although right now it is hard for me to think about him no longer being in this world with us sitting at the head of the table for Sunday dinner chomping on those hot peppers, not here on Christmas to read the Christmas Story to us as he always has but rather he is rejoicing with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and I know when my time comes to join my Heavenly Father this special, special uncle of mine will be there to greet me with open arms into my heavenly family just like he welcomed me with open arms when I was a 4 month old orphan and  I became a member of his family.  Wow, what a lucky girl I am.

Angel Baby's Birthday

I have had a hard time sleeping tonight so I decided to just getup at 3:00 am to begin my day.  This is VERY unusual for me because as many of my friends know I am not an early riser but today is different.  It was 17 years ago around this time that I instructed Daddyboy we needed to head to the hospital.  Princess was already at her grandparents house spending the night because we kind of felt like it was going to be a middle of the night trip. And a princess needs her undisturbed beauty sleep.  I know I was so scared.  Not really scared of the labor I knew I was about to go thru but just the fact that God had given us the gift of another precious life .  And how were we going to do?  The first curve ball came when we found out our private insurance policy would not cover anything unless the baby arrived 3 weeks late because that is when our maternity coverage would begin.  Daddyboy and I could not even begin to figure out how we were going to cover that.  Well we did get the Doctor's bill paid before we had to go to the hospital by some miracle and we still feed the princess and ourselves.  But we discussed that $500 epidural.  I must have been out of my mind or something because I agreed with Daddyboy that was one way to save money, I could be tough and do with out it.  Let me say, not a wish decision.  By the time that we arrived at the hospital I wanted my drugs!!! They got me into the labor and delivery room, settled in a rocker and wanted me to try the whirlpool tub for the pains.  I said no thank you, please give me the epidural.  The sweet midwife held my hand, stroked my back and said you can do this without the epidural.  I maintained my cool and said no, I really want that epidural, PLEASE, (see I was still remembering the manners my southern mama taught me)  Then Daddyboy came bouncing in.  He said Now honey, remember we talked about this and agreed that was one way to save $500.  Remember sweetheart?  All of this said with a big goofy grin on his face.  That was it!!!  I pulled him down into my face (hey I know I had horrible smelling breath at that point) and I think my face split open.  The devil being in me came out and said I WANT THAT EPIDURAL NOW, AND I DO NOT GIVE A DAMN HOW YOU PAY FOR IT, YOU CAN CUT OFF YOUR RIGHT BALL FOR ALL I CARE!!!!  I think Daddyboy believed me, far more than that midwife did because he rushed right out in the hall to get this request rolling down the line.  Within 5 minutes the Doc was in there administering it to me.  RELIEF!!!!  After about 6 hours, The Price is Right was coming on the midwife said I think it is time to push, by the way I have a student midwife here, would it be alright for her to help deliver the baby.   Well what a fine time to ask.  I would have let about anyone.  4 pushes and our Angel Baby arrived.  All red and screaming and BLONDE!!!  I did a double take, BLONDE was not even on my radar.    The Princess had arrived with dark hair, dark eyes and a bit jaundice, I really thought she had alittle sun tan.  Angel Baby looked so different to me.  I had always said I wanted a blonde, blue eyed baby but my mother in law always said that my dark colors would dominate.  Blonde and blue eyed not going to happen according to her.  Well let's just say what I have always said to Daddyboy, Yo mama don't know everything!!!  So here was our beautiful baby girl weighing in at 9 pounds 7 ounces and 21 1/2 inches long.  She was a whopper of a baby.  I walked down to see her in the nursery and thought she was so beautiful.  Then a toothless monger standing next to me looked at my angel baby and said, "I tell you one damn thang, if you had squirted that big ole out you would not be standing here."  It was then that the mother lion came out in me and I said That dear lady is my baby and as you can see I am standing very well.  And I am still standing very well today as we get ready to celebrate her 17th birthday.  Angel Baby is so different than Princess.  Princess always has liked a big party to celebrate birthdays and Angel Baby just likes doing something with a few close friends.  So tonight Daddyboy and I are taking her along with her boyfriend, more commonly referred to as That Boy (said with love) and her Grandy to the smartest Italian restaurant in the world for dinner.  Now why you might ask do I say it is the smartest, well the big deal about this place is if it is your birthday you eat FREE.  But only you.  And how many people do you know that will come to the restaurant by themselves.  In fact because you are celebrating a birthday you probably bring more people than normal.  So that free birthday dinner table usually ends up with a check for around 70.00.  Smart Restaurant.
Daddyboy and I grow closer each day to having this babies raised the best we can.  We have made so many mistakes.  But that the good Lord above He has watched out for us and so far we have 2 precious girls!  Happy Birthday Angel Baby - you were our biggest surprise and one of greatest gifts from our heavenly Father! Sometimes we don't know what we need but Jesus does and he knew life would not be complete without Angel Baby.

Settling in to a new way of life -- BROKE!!!

DaddyBoy and I are trying to get use to having no extra money.  Not that we had much before but since we have sent Princess of to college we are now about ready to go on food stamps!!!  While Princess is living it at college, we are stuck here at home eating beans and rice!!  Angel Baby is suffering at home with us too.  She is trying to help me start couponing!!  Bless her sweet heart.  We started working on my coupon book today.  Not so sure how this will go, only time will tell.  Now that I have found the most wonderful place in the internet world, Pinterest, I am going to try my best to find new and interesting recipes for the family.  I am going to try to use better organizational skills so I know what I really have and what I don't have.  And I am just going to have to find my entertainment on the web!!!  DaddyBoy is not really that entertaining.  Maybe this will be a bonding time for us - who knows?  I kind of doubt it because I really like the finer things in life, you know like Charmin toilet paper instead of the No name brand.  It is Saturday night here in Lippyville and we are getting ready to settle in for dinner.  Please feel free to share any money saving tips you might have that I might could use.

What did we do before texting?

I am just not sure how I survived without my Iphone! I use it everyday I love listening to my music, which my husband says is a very unique selection. I have show tunes, christian music, hard rock, country, pop, oldies and the list goes on. I can honestly say I can enjoy almost any kind of music.  And there are so many apps to load on.  Pandora is one of my favorites.  I can do so much from my Iphone - send and check emails, text my friends, take pictures and one of my favorite things - listen to audiobooks.  The one thing I do the least on my Iphone is talk.  Isn't that crazy?  For goodness sake - it is a phone after all.  But I seem to like to text people more than talk to them.  In a way I guess that is sad but in another way it is great.  I can get in touch with my girls and get a response back,  Before I learned to text it was harder to communicate with the girls. (We are still trying to convince Daddyboy texting is the way of the future, he needs to get on board!)  Although I did tell them it was not wise to ignore a phone call from the person who pays the phone bill, they would always have an excuse as to why they did not answer.  Now that I can text (and I text very well I might add) I understand why people would rather do that.  I have even cut off where people can leave me a voice mail.  Who has time to retrieve them?  I know texting may seem impersonal but it is just so much easier than getting caught on the phone with Chatty Cathy that you really just need to tell one thing and before you know it they have taken up an hour of your life.  Who really cares about her crazy mother in law!  Plus when you text someone if you are smart you think about what you are saying.  I am not put on the spot as often because I do not have to answer a text immediately, I can wait until I decide how I want to reply.  With texting I can send the same message to 10 different people in just a minute instead of having to call each of them.   Of course as with all things there are draw backs to texting.  Sometime I wonder exactly what the person meant because I cannot hear how they are saying something.  Like if they say "Girl you are crazy"  Well do they mean I am crazy funny or perhaps they mean I need to be in a mental institution, either of these could apply depending on what day it   But for the most part I think texting is great.  Well that is except for texting when you are not in your right mind.  An example would be after you have dental surgery.  Not a good time to let your friend know exactly what you think of her new haircut.  There have been times that Daddyboy has taken the computer and phone away to help me avoid those sticky situations.  

So say what you want about technology today but texting is the bomb!!! 

BIG EVENTS!!

Well once again it has been a long time since I posted anything but ya'll I have been very busy trying to get the Princess out of school.  In less than 10 weeks my girl will graduate high school and be moving on to bigger things, like a dorm room (ha, ha how small is that!)  I have also been having to make visits to my local pharmacy for refills on my nerve pills because Angel Baby is now a road warrior!  I am beginning to wonder if Daddyboy and I are going to survive all of these big events.  It really just seems like yesterday that I was arguing with the lady that was doing my ultrasound that I was not having a baby girl but rather a baby boy.  In fact I was so sure she was wrong I refused to do a nursery in anything but blue.  Well, guess what, that lady did know what she was talking about not only that time but the second time we went to visit her.  God decided to bless us with 2 beautiful daughters.  The only boys that we would have would be our precious puppies!  There have been so many difficult times that the people I love so much have been thru in the past two years that sometimes it is hard to remember all of the blessing that we do have.  So today I am making the choice to think of the two greatest blessing in my life and thank God that He knew baby boys were not what we needed.  We needed the two precious girls He gave us that had to sleep in a blue nursery!

My Sister, My Friend, My Hero Susan Jensen

I have not even thought to post on my blog for nearly one year.  There has been so much going on in my life, I think I have experienced one of life's most excruciating experiences.  I lost my 40 year old sister in March of this year after a 4 year heroic battle with breast cancer. 
Susan was one amazing person and I never mean for anyone to think when I tell her story and the fact that it did not have the ending that we had all hoped for that I am being negative because I am not. Not only was her cancer triple negative but it was also inflammatory breast cancer which is not common at all.  But she lived the life of a true Christian and never questioned why God had allowed this to happen.  I have to say that I was so blessed to be her sister and it was truly God's blessing. People reading her Caring Bridge don't  know that we were adopted sisters because we never thought of ourselves that way. We might not have shared blood in our veins but we had a true love for each other in our hearts.  As far as the two of us being alike - in most ways that could not be further from the truth.  At times what I might call my quick wit - she would call putting my foot in my mouth and I could just see her shutter!!!  At times her anal ways would make me shutter too!!  I know she prayed so much for my girls to survive their growing up years with me as their mom!!!  I do think God allows our love ones to look down on us to see how we are doing in life and to also know how we felt about them.  I still hope that I cause her to blush and shake her head with with some of the things I do.  I also hope that I make her proud with the things I do.   I could not have had a blood sister that I would have loved more.

  This month is a very hard month for me - we had a wonderful vacation at the beach last year with her and it is so hard to believe that has been only one year. And her 41st birthday would be the 19th of this month. Although she never questioned why God allowed this to happen to her, I have to say I do.  She had so much to offer this world why did this have to happen but perhaps God needed her for other things.

She taught me so much and I am not sure she even knew how much she did teach me.  Susan walked the walk and talked the talk of a true child of God until she drew her last breath.  How honored I am that God saw fit to allow me to be a part of her life.  I have so many stories that I look back on and laugh. I also have so many things that I know will go on in the future that will make me cry because she is not here to enjoy them with me.  Lots of those things will be things that involve my girls.  She enjoyed being an aunt so much.  My daughters were so blessed to have her.  There are just some things that I could share with her that I now have no one else that can truly understand.  That is something I never thought about.  When another family member made me mad - I could call her up and tell her about it.  We could dish the dirt but then hang up knowing that we still loved that person and our conversation would never go further.  That is just our sister thing.  She could let me have it ( trust she did that on many occasions) and I could let her have it (hard to believe I know but I did that on many occasions) and her having cancer did not change that in any way.  She told me one time to not think that her being sick would change anything about how we fussed with each other.  And trust me it did not.  But we always said our peace and then it was over.  We both knew the other one still loved us. 

I know that Susan, even if she could, would not want to come back to this place.  She is in a far better place, a place that our Heavenly Father created for His children but even that does not take away the fact of how much I miss her.  I know that both she and my mother are anxiously awaiting our arrival in Heaven and when it is my turn to go I  know I have seeing them along with the other family members that have gone before us to look forward to.  And I will be in the presence of my heavenly Father. 

So until that day I hope that I will live my life here on earth in a way that I can impact people in a positive way, the way that Susan lived her life.  If you knew Susan - you were blessed - If you did not know her - well you missed knowing an awesome person but once you read her journal on Caring Bridge you will feel like you did know her.  I do hope you will feel free to share her caring bridge link because she would not want her ministry to not continue on.  Death did not defeat her. Please help me to continue her legacy.

Homecoming 2009

I cannot believe that my Baby is old enough to go to the Homecoming Dance!!!!

Circle of Friends

I am realizing the older that I get the true value of friendship. Each friendship is so different and requires different things. I believe we need all of these friends because we all have so many different needs in our lives. There are friends that come into our lives for a season in which we need them (man God does provide doesn't He?) and then disappear, never to be heard from or seen again. But those friends are never forgotten. I also have the occasional friend. This is the friend that I see at weddings, showers and funerals. I also have my cyber friends. I know I will never meet this friend face-to-face but some of these friends I know better than people I see everyday. We have our "professional" friends. These are the people we work with and perhaps are in civic clubs with. They can help us problem solve at work and sympathy with professional issues. My husband and I have couple friends. I also have "friends of a friend" friends. These are people I have met thru other friends. I may never know them well but none the less we are friends. But then there are my "girlfriends". These are the gals that I love so much and enjoy being around. I can share my deepest secrets and not fear being judged. These are the friends that I can count on when the cards are down or will be there for me when things are good. Each of these girl friends are different and serve a different purpose within that circle but each quality they bring with them makes each of them equally important. One is patient and caring while another is brutally honest. These ladies are such an important part of my life and I feel their importance each day.
I think it is essential that everyone has friends in their lives, even though that puts you out there to be hurt or betrayed. We will all come to the realization that some people we thought were our friends are not, sometimes these people are even toxic to us. But the joys we receive from our friends can never be measured and far out weigh the pain. We just got to remember that it’s the growth of the quality of friendship and those memorable moments that we share that hold so closely to our hearts.

Summer Television Shows!!

I have been so excited about some the new shows on TV this summer along with returning shows like The Closer. Has that show not been fabulous this year? I love Kyra Sedgwick. She is fantastic as Brenda. Don't you just think it is great when she says "Thank you so much" to everything. True Southern Manners. The episode where Kitty went to heaven had me in tears! Carrying around Kitty's ashes in her pocketbook. And what do you all think about Lt. Provenza with his new love interest? He sure is dressing really snappy this season.
The best new show of the season I think is Drop Dead Diva. Did anyone catch that this week? Fantastic. Read more about it here - http://www.grrltv.com/drop-dead-diva-new-lifetime-summer-series/ - This show is going to be a hit. The star of the show, Brooke Elliott, is plus size. She is so adorable. Love it. The creator of the show created Bones (one of my very favorite shows, Seeley Booth is so HOT) so I knew this had show had to be good and I was not disappointed. Check it out this Sunday at 9:00.

Weddings that you feel VERY important at!!!

Princess and I went to a wedding this weekend and I have to say I was feeling very important. It just so happens I, yes that is right, I introduced this couple a few years ago. So I had abit of a puffed out chest. I have to say I did match up a handsome couple. I just knew there would be a prominent place for me to sit. I thought there might even be enough space for princess to sit in that area with me. I was some what shocked to find I merely had a regular seat. HMMM! But once the wedding began it did not matter. Prior to the beginning of the ceremony I was saying something to princess about she would see one day how it felt to be a mom and her daughter thinking she was just the the dumbest thing next to dirt and I hoped that I would be around to hear it. You will not believe what she said -she replied that I would not hear it because I could not hear good now. I think I am going to quit hearing her request for money and other things. I found at the reception I was told many times that I was responsible for this union. You know me- always glad to take the credit for something good, lets hope this marriage stays good. I don't want bad press!!! Also I did mention not to send me the bill for the wedding and would not send them the bill for my match making services.

As usual I was scouting out the single boys for my princess and did I find her a cutie pie. And I think he might have looked at her a couple of times. AND, this is very important, he has fantastic parents. That is of utmost importance to me because those people are the ones that I will have share my grandchildren with and let me tell you there are alot of boys I really like but their mamas, not so much!!!I cringe at the thoughts of "his mother" trying to take over and be bitchy, that is so my job! That is why I have had to put up with these hormonal girls growing up, she did not have to do that. She had her time with her sweet boy while he was growing up - I did not have my time with my girls growing up, they were too busy for me. But that is suppose to all change when they get married. Not that I want Princess or Angel Baby getting married anytime soon but I am already on the prowl for a good son-in-law that has parents I like, will be good to my girls and can produce pretty grand babies!!!